Friday, April 29, 2011

LA Meet-Up




June 25th. I am so there. She has more info about it on the actual youtube page. So I would suggest watching it on youtube....

*Bestie if you're reading this, you and me for sure got to go! lol

Nappy Head Pt. 2

Moving back home is gonna be difficult. Not because I won't have as much space or because I won't be free. But because my parents don't "understand" my hair.

Last night my mom said to me "whats up with the hair?" When I told her I liked it this way, she looked at me and said well you know it looks "nappy" right? I just looked at her. Had nothing to say. She then asked why I keep it like "that" and I told her it's cause I don't feel comfortable with my hair straight. I then proceeded to tear up and cry. I couldn't help it. I hate to cry, but at that moment I realized that this journey was no longer going to be easy.

I've been sheltered in SD. I'm out there with all those white people. If anyone says anything about my hair, it's usually a compliment. I can walk around my apt, shower cap on, dc-ing and pre-pooing in peace. Come June, I'll no longer be able to do that. Ridicule and side eyes await me at home.

I'm going to have to go at this alone in my house. Depending on the internet and my one friend to keep me from the flat iron. It sucks. I wish I had some sort of support at home. But I don't, and there is no use in crying over it (well, not anymore).

That conversation last night also showed me how necessary my t-shirt line is. Not just for me, but for anyone out there dealing with my same situation. Anyone being bought up in an environment where you're happiness in your uniqueness is being stifled by the systematic thoughts of a monolithic society. There is an official fire burning inside me. I thought I would be able to share my plans with my parents, but I know now that I can't. So I'll be going at it alone. And that's fine. I don't need a team behind me. Just a dream, a friend, and some faith, and I have all three.

I will be who God intended me to be. I will let my voice be heard. I will wear my hair natural and free. And I won't let anyone stifle me!


*s/n. I ended up lying to my mom and told her that I was crying because I was tired of being in school and SD all together. Which I am. I'm also nervous about what I'm going to do after school. How I'm gonna keep my bills paid, and etc. But not tired or nervous enough to make me cry. Those thoughts are easily forgotten with music and monster.com. lol

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Great Advice

Health:

  • Drink plenty of water.
  • Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
  • Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
  • Live with the 3 E’s - Energy, Enthusiasm and Empathy
  • Play more games.
  • Read more books than you did in 2010.
  • Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
  • Sleep for 7 hours.
  • Take a 10-30 minutes walk daily. And while you walk, smile.

Personality:

  • Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
  • Don’t have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
  • Don’t over do. Keep your limits.
  • Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
  • Don’t waste your precious energy on gossip.
  • Dream more while you are awake.
  • Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
  • Forget issues of the past. Don’t remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
  • Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don’t hate others.
  • Make peace with your past so it won’t spoil the present.
  • No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
  • Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
  • Smile and laugh more.
  • You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Society:

  • Call your family often.
  • Each day give something good to others.
  • Forgive everyone for everything.
  • Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
  • Try to make at least three people smile each day.
  • What other people think of you is none of your business.
  • Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:

  • Do the right thing!
  • Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
  • However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
  • No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
  • The best is yet to come.
  • Your Inner most is always happy. So, be happy.

If you haven't checked out my poetry blog

You should! lol

HERE

QOTD

"Civil disobedience is not our problem. Our problem is civil obedience. Our problem is that numbers of people all over the world have obeyed the dictates of the leaders of their government and have gone to war, and millions have been killed because of this obedience… Our problem is that people are obedient all over the world in the face of poverty and starvation and stupidity, and war, and cruelty. Our problem is that people are obedient while the jails are full of petty thieves, and all the while the grand thieves are running the country. That’s our problem."

-Howard Zinn

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Nappy Head

I remember one time my dad called me nappy head. It hurt me so much so, that to this day I still bring it up in discussions with my mom and siblings. Not that time he whooped me, the lectures, or the countless times he’s told me off for whatever reason. I bring up that one moment. That one word hurt me so much. Not the word itself, but the negativity and malice surrounding it. Nappy. My hair is nappy, and kinky, and coily, and curly. It’s beautiful. But at that moment, it was hideous. Ugly. Negative. it was one of my many insecurities.

I used to hate going outside of my house when my hair wasn’t pressed. My skin would crawl. Stomach turn. Complete anxiety over the thought of anyone outside my family getting a glimpse of my nappy hair. This is how I, and countless other girls grew up. Being afraid to showcase our crowns. Looking in the mirror and seeing an ugly girl. Ignoring our beauty.

It’s hard being burdened with an ideal beauty. Being one of the only races who can’t submit. Black, nappy, and curvy growing up in a place that worships pale, straight, and thin. It’s damn near impossible to have any type of self esteem.

But I do.

I’m more comfortable in my naps than I’ve ever been. And it for sure ain’t easy. I’m the only one with super coarse hair. My step-mom’s side got Indian in they’re blood (like, for reals. they really do). So it’s easier to manage their hair. And even though my maternal grandfather is something (I think Mexican. his cousins are straight up Compton cholo’s), my daddy’s genes are strong and I’m as black as they come. I think the difficulty of it all, makes my mental victory that much sweeter. To stand up and love me, despite what I’ve been trained all my life. It is a wonderful feeling indeed.

So, to all the girls (and boys) out there who feel the sting of the phrase “nappy head,” i feel your pain. But know, that you are beautiful. Wear your crown proud, cause it is glorious. Revel in the uniqueness of your tresses. Stand up tall, confidence and self-esteem intact, and let the oppressors know, that you’re not succumbing to the “ideal” anymore!

As I get older, I'm realizing that I'm super sensitive.

But not about things that affect me. Say what you want about me, I’ll give you the side eye and keep it pushing. Try to knock me down, I’ll stand up, look you up and down, and continue on as I was (but better). Do these things to my brothers, my friends, the girl across the street, that guy I’ve never met, and I get completely livid. Hurt my brother, I cuss you out now and cry later. Call the President a fraud, I rant and weep.

I’m a sensitive ass female. Not for me, but for them. Maybe that’s a drawback of being a poet….

Monday, April 25, 2011

My t-shirt line is coming along fabulously

...in my head. lol

I need to start writing things down. Make it more concrete.

I also need a name for my line. and some money so I can get it off the ground.

I pray my enthusiasm and passion doesn't fade before I'm able to secure the funds to make this happen. I don't believe it will. But you just never know...

QOTD

“When I paint my object is to show what I have found and not what I am looking for. In art intentions are not sufficient and, as we say in Spanish: love must be proved by facts and not by reasons. What one does is what counts and not what one had the intention of doing.”

—Pablo Picasso, Statement, 1923

Bought



Bee Mine "Bee Hold Curly Butter"

I'm so excited to finally have this product. It cost a little more than I'm usually willing to spend, but shipping was free and I was determined to have it! lol. Hopefully it works and last me a long while.

I have to speak on the shipping. Not only was it free, but it was quick. I placed my order after 1pm on Friday (04/23) and received it today (Monday, 04/25). I have NEVER received anything that fast! If I never need other hair products, I am for sure going through them again.

Bought from BGLH marketplace

10 Myths About Introverts

Myth #1 – Introverts don’t like to talk.
This is not true. Introverts just don’t talk unless they have something to say. They hate small talk. Get an introvert talking about something they are interested in, and they won’t shut up for days.

Myth #2 – Introverts are shy.
Shyness has nothing to do with being an Introvert. Introverts are not necessarily afraid of people. What they need is a reason to interact. They don’t interact for the sake of interacting. If you want to talk to an Introvert, just start talking. Don’t worry about being polite.

Myth #3 – Introverts are rude.
Introverts often don’t see a reason for beating around the bush with social pleasantries. They want everyone to just be real and honest. Unfortunately, this is not acceptable in most settings, so Introverts can feel a lot of pressure to fit in, which they find exhausting.

Myth #4 – Introverts don’t like people.
On the contrary, Introverts intensely value the few friends they have. They can count their close friends on one hand. If you are lucky enough for an introvert to consider you a friend, you probably have a loyal ally for life. Once you have earned their respect as being a person of substance, you’re in.

Myth #5 – Introverts don’t like to go out in public.
Nonsense. Introverts just don’t like to go out in public FOR AS LONG. They also like to avoid the complications that are involved in public activities. They take in data and experiences very quickly, and as a result, don’t need to be there for long to “get it.” They’re ready to go home, recharge, and process it all. In fact, recharging is absolutely crucial for Introverts.

Myth #6 – Introverts always want to be alone.
Introverts are perfectly comfortable with their own thoughts. They think a lot. They daydream. They like to have problems to work on, puzzles to solve. But they can also get incredibly lonely if they don’t have anyone to share their discoveries with. They crave an authentic and sincere connection with ONE PERSON at a time.

Myth #7 – Introverts are weird.

Introverts are often individualists. They don’t follow the crowd. They’d prefer to be valued for their novel ways of living. They think for themselves and because of that, they often challenge the norm. They don’t make most decisions based on what is popular or trendy.

Myth #8 – Introverts are aloof nerds.
Introverts are people who primarily look inward, paying close attention to their thoughts and emotions. It’s not that they are incapable of paying attention to what is going on around them, it’s just that their inner world is much more stimulating and rewarding to them.

Myth #9 – Introverts don’t know how to relax and have fun.
Introverts typically relax at home or in nature, not in busy public places. Introverts are not thrill seekers and adrenaline junkies. If there is too much talking and noise going on, they shut down. Their brains are too sensitive to the neurotransmitter called Dopamine. Introverts and Extroverts have different dominant neuro-pathways. Just look it up.

Myth #10 – Introverts can fix themselves and become Extroverts.
A world without Introverts would be a world with few scientists, musicians, artists, poets, filmmakers, doctors, mathematicians, writers, and philosophers. That being said, there are still plenty of techniques an Extrovert can learn in order to interact with Introverts. (Yes, I reversed these two terms on purpose to show you how biased our society is.) Introverts cannot “fix themselves” and deserve respect for their natural temperament and contributions to the human race. In fact, one study (Silverman, 1986) showed that the percentage of Introverts increases with IQ.

(Source)


*If you ever wanted to know more about me.

Sunday, April 24, 2011

I want to be like her when I "grow up"

Lol. this woman is absolutely gorgeous. I really hope she keeps up with her blog...



Check her out HERE



"Your Love is Like the Morning Sun" - Al Green

QOTD




“We have the same spiral in our hair as electricity, tornadoes, whirlwinds, DNA, galaxies!”

-Nekhena Evans

NCOTD



Base: Zoya "Tobi"

Flowers: Zoya's "Mitzi" and "Phoebe"


*as you can see, I'm loving flowers right now. they're so damn easy and make cute little accents. I can't help but include them. lol

Saturday, April 23, 2011

Thrifted




I had to go to the mall today to return some merchandise. Instead of taking the freeway, I decided to take the street all the way down, just so i could have a chance to relax and listen to music. On my way there, I spotted a Thrift Store. I told myself I would stop by on the way back home. I went there not expected to find anything. Instead, i ended up buying some jewelry. lol. In total, all 5 pieces came to about 13 something. There was another bracelet that I wanted, but I was being cheap and didn't want to spend 10 dollars on one single thing. I was also gonna get a new brooch too, but couldn't decide which one I wanted (I'm so indecisive). lol.

But yeah. I just wanted to share my purchase. I for sure want to thrift a lot more this summer.

I also picked up a crop top from the mall. I've never worn one before, so it should be interesting. lol

My Body Role Model



(Source)

This picture makes me want to sprint to the gym. lol




Brief article about body role models.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Just went through my notebook and noticed that I haven't written a legit poem in about a month. Just have a few random thoughts jotted down.

Damn. I am in desperate need of inspiration.


However, I did update the poetry blog. Just three old poems. Might add a few more later. I'm weird and like to stop at even numbers (last poem is #10. lol)

Anywho. You can read them here

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

NCOTD






Fingers: Base- China Glaze "Happy Go Lucky"; Flowers- Zoya "Mitzi" and "Tobey"

Toes: Base- China Glaze "Flyin' High"; Flowers- Zoya "Mitzi" and "Tobey" and Island Girl "Hawaiian Paradise"

QOTD

“In my opinion, the young generation of whites, blacks, browns, whatever else there is, you’re living at a time of extremism, a time of revolution, a time when there has got to be a change. People in power have misused it, and now there has to be change and a better world has to be built, and the only way it is going to built is with extreme methods. And I for one, will join in with anyone, I don’t care what color you are, as long as you want to change this miserable condition that exists on this earth. Thank you.”

— Malcolm X

Things I Want to Accomplish

  • Find a good career before summer ends
  • Explore Los Angeles county (and other CA counties)
  • Paint
  • Become a licensed nail tech
  • Create my own t-shirt line
  • Meet someone or experience something that inspires me to write everyday
  • Befriend some handsome, cool, creative men (and women-minus the handsome)
  • Publish my poetry (maybe)
  • Be more open and friendly, and loving
  • Get more tattoos
  • Buy a new car
  • Pay off all my credit cards

*might add more later

Monday, April 18, 2011

I want to paint

I've been wanting to paint for a while now. I'm not really sure why. But I have this overwhelming urge to just be creative. I'm no artist. But I do enjoy doodling (while I'm bored in class. lol).

I've come up with an idea to incorporate drawings and doodles into my poetry. I feel like it would be really fun to do.

My mind is everywhere. I'm getting excited for school to end and my life to start. So this is yet another reason for me to be excited for summer! =)


Until then, I'm gonna be glued to MS Paint. lol. And maybe some color pencils.



*this documentary I watched about Jean Michel Basquiat for sure is not helping my urges. lol

Thursday, April 14, 2011

50 Things You Need to Give Up Today

Another dope article


Read Here

Hair Post

I wore my hair out at school today. I've never gone to class or work with my hair just...out. It's usually in a french braid, twist, or a small puff. Never just out. Technically it is in a puff, but it's a big one. I added the flat twist in front because i couldn't go all out and just wear an afro. I also had to pin some hair up because the ends are straight and it looked weird. All in all, although I felt like some people were staring, I felt really good with this style. I felt confident and I really thought I looked cute with it. lol








the earrings:




**I can't wait for my hair to get bigger!!!

NCOTD




Zoya "Ivanka"


*This is a very lovely color. I thought it was much darker than it is, which is why I've kind of stayed away from it (I'm not too into dark colors). It's actually brighter than it shows up in the picture.

**also, sorry about the pic. I messed up the mani before I could snap pics and didnt want to redo it. So I chose not to do a close-up. lol

I Got My Cap and Gown Today

I'm so stoked. Graduation is getting closer, and I'm slowly starting to get started on my work. lol

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

QOTD

No one is in control of your happiness but you; therefore, you have the power to change anything about yourself or your life that you want to change.
Barbara de Angelis

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

QOTD

"If the thought of lack – whether it be money, recognition, or love – has become part of who you think you are, you will always experience lack. Rather than acknowledge the good that is already in your life, all you see is lack.”
- Eckhart Tolle


*I need to start acknowledging what I have, as opposed to always dwelling on what I DONT have...

Monday, April 11, 2011

Who Has Our Back



I just read a good article on Clutch. I don't feel like commenting on it. But you should definitely check it out





Awesome Giveaway

You could win this:



Or this:



This:



Or even this:




Click Here to enter

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Top 5 Mani's

I decided to make a list of my top 5 (well, 6 and some honorable mentions) favorite manicures to date.


5. Essie "Splash of Grenadine" w/ OPI "Show It and Glow It" accent



4. Zoya "Crystal" w/OPI "Bring on the Bling" accent



3. NYC "Polyester Pink Creme" w/Essie "Carnival" top coat

*Crappy pic. Sorry

2. Essie "Tart Deco" and China Glaze "Recycle"



1. China Glaze "Shower Together", Essie "Lapis of Luxury", Sally Hansen "Blue Me Away!", Essie "Turquoise and Caicos", and OPI "No Room for the Blues"



All Time Favorite: China Glaze "For Audrey"


Honorable Mentions:


Essie "A Splash of Grenadine"



Zoya "Tobi" and "Robyn"



Zoya "Kelly" and Icing "Fifi"



Essie "Tart Deco" and China Glaze "Recycle"


Milani "Fresh Teal" and Sally Hansen "Black Out"

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

NCOTD



Essie "Splash of Grenadine"

OPI "Show It and Glow It"

Monday, April 4, 2011

Inspiration




*the eyeshadow....

Quote of the Day

“Cowardice asks the question, is it safe? Expediency asks the question, is it politic? Vanity asks the question, is it popular? But conscience asks the question, is it right? And there comes a time when one must take a position that is neither safe, nor politic, nor popular, but one must take it because it is right.”


- Martin Luther King Jr

NCOTD



"Charged Up" - Orly



"Neon Green" - Santee

Lustworthy: Dresses, Pt.1

*I can't afford any of these, and some of them wouldn't even fit right on my body. But they are cute nonetheless. lol

Up first, the Jessica Simpson Collection:










(Source)

Sunday, April 3, 2011

QOTD

"Your true character is revealed by the clarity of your convictions, the choices you make, and the promises you keep. Hold strongly to your principles and refuse to follow the currents of convenience. What you say and do defines who you are, and who you are... you are forever."

Mini Adventure

So yesterday I went on a mini adventure to get some cookies. I was sitting in my room and out of nowhere, got the craziest craving for cupcakes. After searching the internet for a cupcake shop in san diego, i realized that there weren't any near me. While I was searching, I saw an add for Mrs. Fields cookies. My cravings then turned to cookies. Of course, there isn't a cookie shop around me (that would be too easy), so I decided to go to a place that I saw on Yelp. The place was about 10minutes away from me, and since I'm on Spring Break and didn't have anything else to do, I figured why not, and went!
The place is called Uncle Biff's California Killer Cookies






I got a 1/2 dozen, which comes with an extra cookie. I chose 2 Peanut Butter, 1 Peanut Butter with Chocolate Chips, 1 Chocolate Chip, 1 Chocolate Chip with Walnuts, and 2 Oatmeal with Walnuts





The chocolate chip (with and w/out walnuts) and the oatmeal with walnuts were fan-freakin-tastic! They were truly delicious. I personally could live without the peanut butter (very disappointing). The cookies are fairly pricey, but I thought it was worth it. Not like this is going to be a weekly indulgence.

I can't wait to go back!

countdown to graduation

1.5 months

7 weeks

47 days

33 classes

approx 56 hours of class




I made this widget at MyFlashFetish.com.

What is Wrong with our Generation Pt.1

What is wrong with us? Why is it that we refuse to be ourselves?

I notice on social networking sites, a lot of people will type things like "in lil waynes voice", "kanye shrug", etc etc. Why is this? You mean to tell me that you can't even type as yourself? you have to emulate some celebrity in order to get people to understand what you saying? you have to imagine certain things being said in some one else's voice in order to add emphasis? why? if we were having this conversation face-to-face, you wouldn't sound like lil wayne. you'd sound like you. so why do you feel the need to add that little footnote onto your facebook status?

I really don't get my peers. So enthralled by the internet and celebrities who don't give two fucks about them, they can't even type for themselves, let alone live like themselves. It's really sad. What happened to the individual? do they no longer exist? why is it all of a sudden cool to talk like someone else? smh.



*sorry if this post seems disheveled. i'm disheveled. i just don't understand our generation sometimes. just don't make no sense...


"Make Me Say It Again" - The Isley Brothers

Saturday, April 2, 2011

NCOTD




Base: "White On" - Sally Hansen
Polka Dots: "Fifi" - Icing; "Orange Knockout" - China Glaze; "Beach Yellow" - Santee; "Pimp My Nail" - NYX Girls
Accent Finger: "Pimp My Nail" - NYX Girls

Friday, April 1, 2011

Hair Post

Here are some styles I tried out this week.



after I cowashed. Do you see that heat damage? It used to be worse. So I won't even complain.





tuck and roll. sorry the pics are so blurry. for whatever reason, i couldn't get a good pic. this style was very easy, very quick, and cute. however, it was a little too "nice" for an everyday style.





a roller set on wet hair. i was surprised i actually liked this. it came out much better than expected. i'll have to tweak it a bit. but it's cute nonetheless.







turban. i think this look is dope. and i will for sure be stepping my scarf game up. lol

here's the scarf: